The Truth

So unfortunately I have fallen ill and have been unable to write for the past week and also run out of pre-written posts. I don't know when I will be up for writing again but until then I won't be able to post, hopefully it won't be more than a week or two.

“So you were fucking someone else? Explain” Jake spoke as soon as he walked back into the living room after grabbing the pizza.

“Yes I was having sex with someone else, they were giving me what you wouldn’t. I told you what I preferred when having sex and you refused, you refused to even try it…”

“And I told you I couldn’t see myself hurting you because I love you Tay” he threw the pizza down on the table and I believe at this point we both realised neither of us will be eating it.

“Why can’t you understand that it doesn’t hurt me? It gives me pleasure, gives me better orgasms”

I knew the look he was giving me, it was sceptical, he didn’t believe that I could get off on getting hurt.

“I had an arrangement, I would meet up with him once a week and that’s it, it was just sex between the two of us. Can you say the same?” I questioned having a feeling that since the other week wasn’t the first that maybe he had been having sex with countless girls.

“No” he hung his head not looking at me, I couldn’t believe this. There was a part of me that wanted to know how long it has been going on and how many girls but there was a part of me that didn’t. “How long?”

His voice was so quiet I almost missed it, did he really want to know this? Would this be the first time either of us is being 100% truthful in our relationship? Would this fix what was obviously broken but neither of us wanted to accept it as broken?

“Around 6 months into our relationship” his head snapped up and finally looked at me, I could see the hurt on his face.

Jake and I had been dating for around 3 and a half years, so I had been seeing Dom on the side for three years. Too be honest even I’m surprised Dom and I had managed to do it for this long, normally you see in the movies that the affair doesn’t last long and they get caught for doing something stupid, was that why Dom and I came up with the rules, so we wouldn’t get caught?

Jake shook his head before laughing, I narrowed my eyes at him. Why the fuck was he laughing?

“What the hell Jake?” I finally questioned and the sound of my voice stopped him from laughing.

“Why are we so fucked up? I’ve been chasing girls for just as long”

“Chasing?” I questioned

“I like the thrill of the chase, it’s one of the things I enjoyed about being single. I missed that once we started dating, you were the best chase yet Tay”

“So why have sex with them? Why not chase them until they want you?” I don’t know if I really wanted to know this, I just knew we needed everything out in the open.

“I honestly don’t know Tay” his voice was soft, he looked at me before resting his head back on the couch placing his hands over his face.

I surprised myself when I stood up and made my way over to sit beside him, I placed my hand on one of his and pulled it away from his face.

“I don’t want to lose you Tay” he whispered and I shook my head.

“Are we honestly working if I’m going to someone else for sex and your chasing random girls down at the bar?”

“Don’t you love me anymore?”

“I never said that Jake, there are things we aren’t getting in this relationship. How is that normal or healthy?”

“Please baby…”

“Jake I honestly think a break is the best thing for us right now, Emily seems to believe that we have the most unusual fucked up but functional relationship but now having it all out in the open I don’t. We’re both obviously not happy, maybe a break would be good for us”

After having this out in the open I realised something, it didn’t matter if we loved each other we weren’t happy, we were going elsewhere to get something we couldn’t in our relationship. Is there any point in staying together if we aren’t happy?

“Dom’s said the same thing on occasion” wait a second, did Dom know what Jake was doing?

“Wait Dom knew?” I questioned, I couldn’t believe this. I even asked Dom if Jake was cheating on me

“Yes, I’m assuming Emily knew?” I nodded unable to speak. I couldn’t believe this, Dom knew, I asked and he lied to me and then when he found out he acted like he cared about how I was feeling but now, now I was questioning whether or not he truly cared about me.

Jake shocked me when he reached up and cupped my face wiping away the tears I hadn’t even realised had escaped. “Taylor I love you and I want this to work, I can’t lose you”

“But you changed everything by having sex with some girl in our bed Jake, I understand we both fucked up but I didn’t ruin what we had in this house. Can you seriously promise me that you will stop chasing girls?”

Jake was silent for a moment but then he pulled his hands away from my face and looked at his lap all before shaking his head.

“Exactly and I don’t blame you for that, let’s just take a break and see what happens? Maybe go back to the beginning and try dating and learning again, maybe we can learn to do something that will make both of us happy”

Jake nodded before looking at me and I could see that his eyes had welled up, Jake never cried and seeing him like this broke my heart. I reached over and placed my hand on his cheek.

“If we’re meant to be this will work Jake”

“I know Tay and I do truly love you, does it change anything that I was thinking of proposing some day?”

“No, after having all this out in the open I don’t think you would have until you could stop cheating on me and I doubt I would have said yes if I was still seeing the guy on the side”

“I think you’re right but I don’t know if I can do the things you want me too”

“I know but we will try if it means making this work Jake”

After that we fell into a silence and ate the pizza, I had this feeling of thinking Jake would propose any day but knowing he was sleeping around made me realise that the only reason we weren’t engaged was because we were both sleeping around.

I eventually left and I was grateful I didn’t have to get into an argument with Jake about it, he was understanding about us taking a break and seeing what happens and for that to happen we couldn’t live together but the one thing I did know for certain was that if we did get back together we couldn’t live in that house anymore.

I lied when I told Jake I was heading back to Emily’s, I wasn’t. I was heading to Dom’s I needed to know why he refused to tell me about Jake.

I knocked on the front door and he was clearly shocked about seeing me on the other side, we had barely spoken since he had gotten back but it was more on my part then anything.

“What are you doing here Tay?” he questioned but all I did was slap him in response shocking both of us.

The Truth Comes Out

It had been a couple of days since Dom returned from his business trip and our conversation, I was surprised neither of us tried anything since he was gone for three weeks but I didn’t question it since we did need to talk about what would happen if Jake found out the truth.

I had a lot to think about, I needed to talk to Jake and find out everything and I needed to decide if I wanted to work things out and if I did, I needed to tell him the truth but I hadn’t decided yet.

In the end I decided I couldn’t keep ignoring Jake, I pulled out my phone to give him a call.

“Hey Tay” he answered, he sounded cheerful and I hoped it was because I was calling and not because of something else.

“Hi, listen I think we should talk”

He was quiet for a minute and I didn’t know what to expect, “yes of course, listen baby you know I love you and I’m really sorry”

“Jake…” I cut him off, not wanting to hear more of what I already have. “How about I come over and we’ll order in so we can talk, I don’t want to do it over the phone”

“Yeah, I guess. I will see you later baby, I love you” he sounded so dejected at my idea of talking later, I thought he would have been pleased at the idea of me finally wanting to talk to him but I guess not.

“I’ll be by later Jake” it was all I said, he replied okay and he sounded even more dejected, was it because I didn’t say I love you back?

I still loved him but I didn’t want him to know, I didn’t want him to know there might be a chance that I might forgive and take him back.

I made it through the rest of the day keeping myself busy from trying to imagine a billion different ways things could go tonight and I was currently standing in the guest room of Emily’s trying to find the right outfit.

“Are you sure you’re doing the right thing Tay?” I looked over at where Emily was sitting on the bed packing up her make-up supplies.

“I don’t know, there is a part of me that can’t deal with the thought of losing him but then there is another part that doesn’t want anything to do with him and all of this aside I have to keep remembering that I was cheating on him as well and before I decide what happens I have to tell him the truth”

“What about Dom?” Emily raised an eyebrow at me, it was the one thing she couldn’t work out, why would Dom let me cheat on Jake and it was something I didn’t get either.

“He just said to tell him I was having sex with someone else, don’t have to tell him who” I finally found the dress I was looking for, it was light blue, strapless, showed a little cleavage and a lot of leg but was also comfortable enough that I could spend the night on the couch in it if we were up all night talking.

“I still question the friendship between those two, it doesn’t make sense that Dom will have sex with you and willingly hurt his best friend”

“You and me both Em” I agreed with her before pulling on the dress and picking up my nude pumps.

“You look hot and if you don’t come home tonight I will be banging on the door until you answer it and come home” she winked at me causing me to laugh, she grinned at me before leaving heading back to her own room.

I believed her when she said that, it was something she would do and I would love to see the look on Jake’s face when Emily gave him a piece of her mind. By my request Emily has stayed away from Jake and didn’t say anything until I figured out what I wanted to do but me not coming home would give her a reason to turn up there.

It felt weird knocking on the front door of my own house, but there was a part of me reminding me what happened when I entered without knocking and I couldn’t get those images out of my head of Jake and that other girl.

The door opened and Jake looked a little confused, “Tay you don’t have to knock, it’s your house as well”

I shrugged but didn’t say anything and walked past him to enter the house but I stopped in the hallway having no idea where I wanted to do this.

“Living room?” Jake suggested when he realised why I stopped, I just nodded at him before following him into the living room.

Even though Jake took a seat on the couch I walked over and took a seat on the arm chair, I knew it would be easier here where I wouldn’t have to feel the heat coming from his body if I sat close to him. I couldn’t help but notice the hurt that flashed through his eyes at this but I had to remember why I was here.

“I ordered your favourite pizza, it should be here soon enough Tay”

“Thanks…”

We both fell into a silence after that, I thought it was weird for Jake considering every moment we have spoken or I’ve run into him he tried to apologise over and over again but then again I yelled at him over and over again telling him I needed space.

“Listen Tay…” and here is the speech I was expecting to hear from him as soon as I got here but I couldn’t sit here and listen to him apologising for the same thing I was doing.

“No don’t Jake, I came here for a reason and just let me say what I want to” I cut him off and he looked at me like a wounded puppy…god how was he going to look once I said what I did.

I was expecting Jake to say something and ignore what I said but he just nodded and allowed me to continue.

“Look I’m not hurt over the fact that you were having sex, I’m hurt over the fact that it was in our bed, in our house Jake. You ruined what was ours”

“I know and I’m so sorry Tay, listen it was only once”

“Was it only once?” I questioned not knowing what to expect, I think a part of me was hoping that we were both in the wrong for just as long.

Watching Jake shift in his seat in silence made me worry, was it just once? Was I in the end going to hurt him by saying I was having sex with someone else behind his back.

“No, well it was only once in our bed. I want to fix things between us baby and if that means hurting you more by telling you the truth then I will, I want to fix things between us Tay I really do” he pleaded with me and the longer this went on the worse I was beginning to feel about it all.

I hung my head not knowing what to say, “Listen Jake, there’s a reason why I’m not hurt in the way you think I am. I was having sex with someone else as well…”

There was a look of shock on his face and his mouth open and closed a couple of times, I couldn’t read the emotions on his face and before any of us could say anything the doorbell rang indicating that the pizza was here.

What Have I Missed? (Dom POV)

I had been gone for almost three weeks when I finally returned home and I was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed instead of a shitty hotel bed.

I hadn’t spoken much to anyone back at home, I was too busy and everyone was used to me being too busy to talk while I was gone. I had a couple of messages from Taylor saying to call me but I figured she was just getting lonely wanted to know when I was coming home but I just ignored them and focused on my work.

I quickly showered before climbing into my bed and getting some much needed rest.

I woke up and followed with my normal morning schedule of getting in a quick work out, showering and getting dressed before heading out. I needed to go visit Jake and have him draw up some contracts for the new clients I had accumulated while I was away before heading into the office to meet with the other partners about what happened while I was away.

I was lucky, I may have a job with a large company but I was able to work from home most days as long as I still turned up for meetings with clients or the rest of the employees and so far I was doing just that.

I entered the building where Jake’s law firm was located, quickly flirted with the smoking hot receptionist before heading back to where Jake’s office was.

I entered and stopped short at the sight of him, “dude you look horrible” I spoke with a smirk on my face as I walked over and took a seat in one of the armchairs but he just proceeded to throw a pen at me.

“Shut the fuck up dude, what are you doing here?”

“Need contracts for new clients but that can wait, what’s going on?” I was worried thinking that Taylor had fucked and that’s why she needed me to call her but Jake was cheating on her as well so I didn’t think he would be this upset over the truth coming out, hell it was something I wanted even though I knew I would probably lose both of them.

“Taylor moved out, now these contracts”

“Woah back up there. Taylor moved out? Why? What the hell did you?” I began firing questions at him but he just threw another pen at me.

I watched as he scrubbed his face with his hands, I’m surprised the senior partners hadn’t said anything about his appearance, he clearly hadn’t shaved in a couple of days and his suit wasn’t up to his usual standard, it was a little wrinkled and he clearly hasn’t been sleeping properly.

“Yes Taylor moved out about a week ago, I fucked up. She was away on business and I made the mistake of bringing a girl home instead of going home with her because Taylor came home early and caught the two of us. And no I don’t need to a hear a fucking told you so from you”

I couldn’t believe this, I had on countless occasions told Jake this was going to backfire on him. Hell I had a feeling one day that my arrangement with Taylor was going to backfire, but how could Jake be stupid enough to bring a girl back to the house he shared with Taylor.

“Why do you keep doing this? You say you love Taylor but yet you keep sleeping with random girls” I questioned, I’ve questioned this a million times but not once I had ever been given an answer, he always brushed me off but he had to know at some point Taylor would ask the same question.

“The chase, I’ve lost that with Taylor and I hated not having it”

“Taylor will lose it at that answer”

“I know Dom, now stop I’ve had enough of this. You don’t think I’ve driven myself crazy thinking how I’m going to fix this with her?” his voice hitched as he spoke and it was then I realised just how upset he was by this.

How the fuck do those two care so much about each other but yet still cheat on each other? It was baffling and I didn’t understand how they could do it.

“Fine but I’m not getting in the middle, you can’t make me be messenger between the two of you”

“Deal, now these contracts you need?” he spoke sternly giving me the hint that he didn’t want me to bring up the incident with Taylor again.

It was then I wondered if this was the reason why Taylor had been asking me to call her?

After the contracts were done I ended up getting lunch with Jake where he finally decided to fill me in on everything that happened, when Taylor discovered the two of them and even the next day when Jake had stayed home from work in hopes of her coming home but all she did was pack her things before leaving.

I was leaving the office and pulled out my phone to call Taylor, I knew she would be annoyed I was taking this long to return her call but she would deal.

“Oh now you decide to return my call, four days later” she snapped at me as soon as she answered, I expected worse but I guess considering everything this was fine.

“I only got back last night Tay, I’ve been working. I spoke with Jake this morning, I had no idea that’s why you wanted to talk”

“He didn’t tell you?” I could tell just by the sound of her voice that she was upset, I had no idea how I was going to handle this if she found out I was helping cover for Jake.

“No he didn’t Tay, I went to his office to get some contracts written up. Tay he looks like shit”

“Dom why are you calling me?” I couldn’t help but notice that she was trying to get away from the topic of Jake.

“I’m heading home from the office now, do you want to come over” I was surprised when she laughed at me.

“Seriously? I find out Jake is cheating on me and you want to have sex?”

“Tay, I thought you would want to talk, I didn’t mean for us to have sex”

She was quiet for too long, I had to even pull my phone away from my ear and see if the call was still there.

“Fine, I’m leaving work now be at yours soon?”

“See you then Tay” I hung up on her as I climbed into my car and headed home.

I don’t know what I was thinking calling Taylor and asking if she wanted to come around to talk, if this was any other relationship I would be on Jake’s side and he would get as the girls joked ‘custody of me’ and I wouldn’t even try and talk to Taylor but I couldn’t help myself.

I wasn’t home for long before there was a knock indicating that she was here, I went over and let her in. If I didn’t know her as well as I did I would have thought that this wasn’t even bothering her but it was her eyes that gave her away, normally they sparkled when she was happy but right now they’re dull.

I watched as her eyes trailed up and down and I smirked at her, “I forgot how good you look in a suit” she gave me a smile attempting to flirt with me making this as normal as possible between us.

“And you look so much better naked” I replied and she grinned before walking past me to enter the house and I couldn’t help but stiffen as she brushed her hand across my groin. “Thought you didn’t want to have sex Tay?”

I watched as she shrugged before looking away from me and I hated what I saw written across her face, I went over to the kitchen to grab us a drink before going back and joining her in the living.

“Thanks” she took the drink I offered her and we were both silent at first.

“What are you going to do about this?” I finally questioned, I knew Taylor well enough to know that if she wanted to fix things with Jake this, our arrangement would have to come to the light of day.

“No idea, I still love him but I’m hurt by what he did and I know it’s stupid considering what we were doing”

“Were?” I couldn’t help but notice the wording she used

“Yeah, I was planning on talking to you about it, I was thinking of stopping what we were doing and focused on my relationship with Jake”

I felt the tinge in my heart knowing if she never found out what happened I would have lost her, “That’s fair, are you planning on talking to him?”

“Eventually, Emily thinks the only way we get passed what happened is if I tell him everything, including what we were doing behind his back”

“Tay…” I wanted to reason with her, tell her that I didn’t want that.

“I know, he’s your best friend but in all honestly why the hell did you agree to this arrangement? He is your best friend, why are you letting me cheat on him?”

“You don’t need to worry about that” I couldn’t tell her the reason why I agreed to it was because I was pissed that Jake stole the girl I wanted and was constantly rubbing it in my face. “Look tell Jake you were having sex with someone on the side, I doubt he will care who it is”

I watched as she nodded staring into her glass before her eyes lifted up to me and I instantly recognised the glint in her eyes, “if our arrangement was still place I would want to add a rule, you have to wear a suit” she grinned at me and laughed, I was pleased to see she relaxed a bit.